This is the 10th and final stage of the 10 Ways Lies Grow series. Click here for the first in the series, and here for the last one if you want to catch up.

This has been a downward spiral where each episode of the #WaysLiesGrow series has been more and more negative. The options become more and more limited for the liar as they move on. As I mentioned in the last one–the lie coming out at these later stages ruins almost all of life eventually. Career  family, friends, reputation, even your freedom itself can be lost in this downward spiral of lying. Stage 10 continues this for the liar as…

10) They Feel Trapped

The liar has told the lies to so many people at stage 10 that they start to feel trapped by the lies. They have repeated the lies and defended them–they’ve made others complicit in the lying and not only told them to family but told them to themselves so many times they start to believe their own lies. They suppress critics and multiply lies upon more lies.

The risks at stage ten of a growing lie are so large that they out-weigh any real-world benefits of confession. The liar cannot see any way out. If the lie is confessed they will lose their job, their husband or wife might leave them, their kids will resent them, their friends will be betrayed, and they might even–in extreme cases–go to jail. The are truly trapped in these lies. The liar finds that they are between a rock and a hard place and a steel curtain and an iron door–all ways out seem blocked.

In each of the stages I’ve outlined, however slim the chance might be, of ways to escape the lie. At stage 10 there is really no escape in this life. Confessing at this point means everything. You will likely lose it all.

But in the midst of that situation I can offer some hope. And it’s not just a “slim hope” it is actual hope. It’s not a wish or a dream… it is true hope. Yes, you may lose your job and your wife and your home and even your freedom… but you still have something left: your soul.

By putting everything up for grabs, by going all in on your confession, instead of your lies, and by risking everything on redemption you might actually find that your soul can be saved. Stage 10 is not the end of life. You are still a living breathing human, I should remind you. You still have a soul, friend. And by confessing the lies you might actually save your soul, or rather, God might save it for you. But you have to let him.

Some say: “confession is good for the soul.” That’s an understatement. A soul without confession is like a lung without oxygen. Breathe out your confession in an exhale of authenticity, and inhale the first honest breaths you’ve sucked in since this all started. You could lose everything and that will still be a great starting point. You could even be in prison and feel free. I’ve seen grown men in their 30s and 40s who confessed their lies to me in prison, and then saw how they finally began to feel freedom–to feel real again. And you know what–one by one God has given them back their physical freedom, their families, jobs, and reputation  Who knows… rock bottom isn’t a bad place to build a foundation for a new life.

You think you’re trapped–but in fact this is one of those obvious turning points where the only true option you have is grace. God is waiting to turn it around with you.

If you’ve missed the Ways Lies Grow series here are all 10 stages. Which one stood out to you?


Jump to any episode of the #WaysLiesGrow Series here:

1) They rationalize it.  “The best pesticide for rationalization of lies is personal integrity.”

2) They get away with it. “A lie is like cancer—the affects of a malignant tumor can come long after discovery.”

3) They tell it twice. “Some who trust me most are those I’ve confessed sin to. Repentance builds trust.”

4) They get good at it. “All professions that require exceptional communication skills are dangerous breeding grounds for lying.”

5) They tell those they love. “Lying to someone close starts to erase the last shreds of dignity a liar has left.”

6) They tell it to themselves. “A liar remembers it like they said it, rather than remembering it like it really was.”

7) They let others tell it. “It’s one thing to ruin your life with lies—it’s another thing to ruin other people’s lives.”

8) They suppress those who question it. “The only thing worse than a liar is a liar with power.”

9) They multiply lies with more lies. “Some giant monster lies have their own offspring: little lies birthed like demons in the dark.”

10) They are trapped by it. “A soul without confession is like a lung without oxygen.”

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