UNNECESSARY PRESS RELEASE

ABOUT DRURY UNIVERSITY

I am posting this to dispel any rumors before they begin. I will do so in the contrived “Q&A” format. Here are your not-so frequently asked questions:

Q: Is there an institution called “Drury University”?

A: Yes.

Q: Does Drury University exist to brainwash normal people and thus turn them into people who think like the extended Drury family, in order to create a de facto Mafioso in Wesleyanism?

A: This false rumor is incorrect. Drury University (from their Mission) ….is an independent university, church-related, grounded in the liberal arts tradition, and committed to personalized education in a community of scholars who value the arts of teaching and learning, instead of brainwashing normal people into members of the extended Drury family. Education at Drury seeks to cultivate spiritual sensibilities and imaginative faculties as well as ethical insight and critical thought, instead of merely thinking like the rest of those in the Drury family; to foster the integration of theoretical and practical knowledge; and to liberate persons to participate responsibly in and contribute to a global community, and to in fact be freed from the over-active thinking of the Drury family.

Q: Is Drury University hiring a new President?

A: Yes.

Q: Is that new president named “David Drury”?

A: No. It is true that Drury U. is interviewing three gentlemen; all of whom have the first name of “David,” so we will inevitably say it is “David, the president of Drury.” But it is not “David Drury.” For more info on the “Davids” see this news release

Q: Are you a supporter of Drury University?

A: Not particularly, other than admitting that it has a cool name.

Q: What undergraduate schools do you support?

A: I am a proud graduate of Indiana Wesleyan University, which is also searching for a new president, after the recent resignation of Dr. Henry Smith. In the month of October I am visiting four other schools I appreciate greatly, and suggest people support: Oklahoma Wesleyan University, Houghton College, Kingswood University & Southern Wesleyan University.

Q: Are you just saying that because these are the official Wesleyan schools?

A: Yes and no. Each of them has their own strengths and weaknesses—but I have confidence in each. I believe that almost any student could find the right fit at one of these schools, if they give them a long look.

Q: Where do you suggest people go to seminary? Do you recommend the one you attended?

A: I recommend Wesley Seminary, which offers the most innovative, affordable, accessible & practical ministerial education. Full disclosure: My brother is a Professor of Theology at Wes Sem.

Q: I asked if you recommended the one you attended. Quit dodging my questions.

A: Could you rephrase that as a question.

Q: What, is this Jeopardy?

A: No, this is not the Jeopardy show. This is my personal website. Jeopardy is on at 7:00 Eastern Time. (Check your local listings). Next question.

Q: Is the “Drury Inn” chain of preferred hotels a secret part of your plan to brainwash people into thinking like the Drury Family by enjoying their fine accommodations and other celebrated accouterments, while subliminally including messaging which aligns thought patterns to your own?

A: No comment.

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